Business or Pleasure? The Power of Authentic Relationships

A while ago I met a wonderful healer on Facebook. We share some of the same interests and I thought we could have some great conversations, compare notes, and maybe grow our tool chests a bit where business is concerned.

Coming from a background in NLP, I had recently begun studying EFT and fell in love using both at the same time (along with other methods), to better serve my coaching clients, as well as work out some of my own blocks. For those of you who have no idea what I’m referring to, please click on the terms to be shown an explanation! Also check out some of the YouTube videos available in these fields as well, since there is an abundance of information out there.

I believe there may be times, for some people (as a practitioner of NLP, EFT, and any other number of paths to healing), you can know too much for your own healing. Much like a doctor trying to do surgery on him/herself. Your subconscious mind knows where you’re going with something, and there is the possibility you won’t actually get to the root cause of an issue. When you know a ball is being thrown at you, you duck, right? (If you don’t, then there are some issues we can work on!) The same may be true when dealing with psychological and emotional work. If you know the questions that are going to be asked, or the “process and procedure”, how do you know your answers are the truth?

I enlisted the help of my awesome Facebook friend, Nathan Martin, for this very reason. We had an initial Skype conversation that lasted about 2 hours, just talking and getting to know each other. We then scheduled a 2 hour block of time the following week, so we could work on each other – a sort of professional time trade.  What happened that day will stay with me for a long time to come.

Our “mutual sessions” were not textbook by any means. And thank God, because I may have not had the shift I did! Nathan has a special way about him – a very approachable, honest, endearing personality – that would melt the coldest of souls. You get the sense that he genuinely cares about you – whether you are a client or his best friend. I wondered if our rapport on a personal level would somehow blur the “professional” session we were about to have. As it turned out, it was the best thing that could have ever happened!

While there were moments when we “got down to business”, the real work took place in seemingly passive conversation. And then it hit me. I realized just how important it is to have authentic rapport with someone when doing healing work (as well as any other interaction). It’s less about how many tools of the trade you’ve studied, and more about how you have integrated compassion and genuine interest within yourself, your work on this planet, and in your relationships. That’s not to say that you have to be best friends with everyone you come into contact with, but it is important to treat them with the same respect, care and concern, as if.

With NLP there is a script you can follow to elicit specific information. But how deep you get relies on your ability to have rapport with that person. And Change? Forget lasting change based on words alone! We are emotional beings, and relationships are CORE to whatever you are doing. That’s why you can change someone’s State based on Trust alone and not a script.

It’s been 48 hours since the end of our last Skype conversation, and I can not tell you how many intense breakthrough’s I have had so far! It feels like there are still some lingering as well, and I know they will pop when the timing is right.  :)

So, Thank you Nathan! Within our friendship there have been many gifts revealed! Thank you, thank you, thank you, for BEing the change in the world.

If anyone feels the desire for a better life, amazing shifts, and to break free from whatever has held you back up until now, friend Nathan on Facebook and check out his site http://freewitheft.com/ for great articles and his contact info. This kind of healing applies to every are of your life – work, external relationships, and anything else you could possibly need. Set up a session today!

XOXO

Getting Out Of Your Comfort Zone Does NOT Have To Be Painful!

Any time I have heard someone talking about “getting out of your comfort zone”, it has been prefaced with the assumption that it was going to be a very uncomfortable, if not outright painful experience. Who in their right mind would inflict pain on themselves?? With no guarantee that the experience will end well, I was personally not too excited about moving myself beyond anything that I was still obviously more comfortable with, even if it was not the best thing for me.

In some cases, what is lumped into that “comfort zone” is not really all that comfortable, and can actually be detrimental and unsafe for you in the long run. So how can we stop resisting the changes that can take us to the next level in every area of our lives, and allow us to create and enjoy all the wonderful experiences we deserve?

Let me tell you about something I recently discovered. I met my soul brother on Facebook last year. (I call him that because I feel like we have known each other forever, and are way closer than any friends I have!) He is absolutely amazing. So much energy, so much love, so much charisma and spunk and fire with an incredible joy and appreciation for life! He is one of those people who is changing the world in some pretty wonderful ways. I get excited at the things he posts online, and the stuff we talk about. His energy is contagious, and always puts me in the best moods. I have often logged on first thing in the morning to get my “daily dose of inspiration” from his Facebook wall, before beginning my day. When I do that, everything just seems to fall into place. I then have the courage to do some things I didn’t think I could do, or wanted to do. Simply knowing him makes me want to be a better person….

And there it is.

I’m not in any pain, it’s not as scary as I thought, since I know I have the support and friendship of someone who will be there to encourage me and cheer me on, without expectation.

When you are supported, and motivated, and encouraged, and know that you cannot fail (“There is no failure, only feedback”)….that makes “stepping out” totally fun! You want to do it, you want to stretch yourself, you want to become more, and give more, and love more. Opportunities present themselves more often, and they are a pleasure to accept and experience and grow with!

You have had these experiences before. Recall at least one time, right now, when you were totally inspired to do something you had never done before. You felt the nervousness of it, and were actually excited to do it! See it, hear it, feel it, remember everything you can about that event.

This is just an example of what’s possible when you can relax into change. Understand that change can be a good thing – and ultimately is (even when it doesn’t seem like it at the time). There is no need to force it. Change is much easier when you feel inspired, supported and not judged.

And while my soul brother has inspired me to incredible heights, I also realize that the best person to get inspiration, support and self acceptance from is myself. You are the one in charge of your choices and emotions regarding change.

I am NOW inspired to make EVEN MORE changes that will radically affect MY LIFE in wonderful ways!

Care to Join Me?

There Is No Failure Only Feedback

Having tried my hand at a great deal of traditional jobs, as well as a few MLM’s, I recently decided my place was elsewhere. When I was little, I didn’t know people could start their own businesses. When I was in high school, I met a few teachers that knew what it was like to step out of the box and try their hand at something creative, independent and more fulfilling than traditional employment. That exposure started wheels turning in my head, and those wheels haven’t stopped!

What did you want to be when you were a kid? I guess depending on your age and what generation you grew up in, the answers will vary. I wanted to be so many things! I just had an interest in so many topics, it was difficult to pick just one. I was taught that you should just pick one thing and stick to it. Not so in my life! My interests ranged from teacher, to doctor, to figure skater, to author. I loved learning. The go to the library and read through everything I could get my hands on kind of learning!

Another thing I loved was helping people. Getting others to that place where they realize they can do anything….that was the ultimate for me. Still is. I use laughter, candor, and anything else available to me at that moment, to snap people out of what they are currently “suffering” from, so a solution can be found.

When I was in the typical W2 working world, I did not stay in one place for very long. It was always one excuse or another why I no longer liked the company or respected the people I worked with. Having to always start over at the bottom, I felt like a failure.

Then Network marketing came along, *ahem* a few times, and after much crisis emotionally and mentally, I decided that I had failed at that too.

Even relationships were pretty short lived (except a couple).

In the midst of trying my hand at MLM’s, I was blessed with an opportunity to learn and become certified in NLP. It was there that I learned the presupposition: “There is no failure, only feedback”. WHOA! That one blew me away, since I was under the impression that I had failed at love, failed at employment, failed at SELF employment…..

What does this really mean,

and how can I apply it to my life right now?

Feedback is incredibly useful in making future choices. People get feedback from books, blogs, videos, even on a Facebook status (in the form of comments). Feedback comes in other forms as well, and not all are written or verbal. You may get a FEELING about a particular person or situation. That is definitely useful feedback! You now have new resources and information that you didn’t have up until this point…

When we are always learning from our experiences, failure cannot exist. It’s simply a process of figuring out how to allow something to work in our lives for the greatest good/outcome.

Personal story….I have 2 little girls. While I was planning on having them naturally – drug free, birthing tub, low lights, midwives, music, no c-section – my birthing experience did not go that way. Not only did I require an epidural for the incredible pain I was in, both of my girls had to be surgically removed by c-section. Both times, it felt as if they were being ripped out of my body, and I was just the packaging! I carried around pain, guilt, shame and disappointment for a very long time, thinking that somehow I had failed.

Failed as a mother for not being able to bring my girls into the world in the most careful and loving of ways. Failed as a wife for not being able to take care of our precious children, which was my responsibility. Failed as a woman, for not having a body that could handle giving birth the way it was meant to.

I did not fail. It took me so long to realize that it was not a failure on my part, that it was just not the end result I was hoping for. Many factors come into play when you are planning something out – sometimes they come out of no where. Doesn’t mean you failed to plan, or are somehow a failure as a person. It just shows you what works and what doesn’t. Just because I couldn’t give birth the way I wanted, doesn’t mean it changed the end result. Healthy little girls! And a mommy that lived to raise them.

Take the information you are given as Feedback, accept the gift, and move forward. Failure gives you an excuse to stop. Feedback gives you the resources to move onward and upward!

TO THE TOP!

Beyond the ViSalus 90 Day Challenge

What started out as a fantastic way to begin changing the health and lives of who ever took on “the challenge”, suddenly turned into: What else can we do in 90 days?

ViSalus has been a wonderful opportunity for me to change my eating habits, drop a few pounds, earn a free BMW, and help others do the same.

But what happens to those out there who are not interested, or don’t need a 90 day health challenge? What if they still want to change their lives, but in a different way? Could the ViSalus 90 Day Challenge actually be a catalyst, a blueprint of sorts to change your life, even without shakes?

YES!!!

YES!!

YES!!

Absolutely!

Beyond the “shakes” of the 90 Day Challenge, ViSalus also offers products such as Neuro – a healthy replacement for those heart-stopping energy drinks, as well as the Vi-Pak – an excellent source of the nutrients we are most likely missing from our every day diet.

So what if you still don’t want or need the products that ViSalus offers? How about a FREE BMW? How would you like a healthy bank account and an opportunity to impact the lives of hundreds, thousands, or more, in a positive way? The challenge is a way to get people excited about change.

The possibilities are endless. The 90 Day Challenge has so much potential to change the lives of anyone who is looking for something better, no matter what area of your life you choose to focus on.

In a very short time I will be opening up my 90 day coaching program to the public.  It is a support and accountability program designed to help you make the transformation necessary to live your dreams!

The website is www.90DayLifeTransformation.com (temporarily linked directly to my ViSalus site until the finishing touches are complete for the official site launch).

Please feel free to check it out and fill out the info section if you want more information on ViSalus!